I trusted myself with you completely.
It’s still there, the burn-
When I think of you it becomes heated.
I think of how you deceived me
And how I was treated.
On my sleeve was the love I openly wore for you
Yet still you lashed out even when I retreated.
As my wounds became deep
I tried to ignore them, to turn the cheek,
But knowing how you lied,
That’s the pain I remember.
Not all the blows you evilly delivered.
And the knots in my stomach-
Even as they bled and I cried,
I had something small hiding in me-
I could barely see it.
But it was there- front and center,
Waiting for me on the long, sturdy pier.
I ran down it to jump in, to cleanse my soul
I will be free of you- let me go.
Understanding, I will be given.
Healing, for so long I’ve needed.
I am no more ashamed, no longer waiting.
I am ready and wanting to receive it.
Now, I look at you from afar
I barely see through squinted eyes,
Yet still, you burden my senses-
There you are!
Searching for someone, anyone to love you
With that same darkened heart.
You tried to collect, but your actions stole
What you can have no more.
Now, you just sit so hopeless on that bench.
I see you acknowledge and take it all in
While drowning in your pitiful stench.
It must be hard for you to maintain-
I can’t comprehend never living like you, lying like you.
I can’t fathom never becoming a man like you.
Drink up that fine liquid courage,
For every night which you partake,
It’s cowardly you will feel in the morning,
Should that lie allow you to wake.
Drink up that evil liquid-
The one where you place all your blame.
Needing that one thing, but having nothing-